I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
