Yo dont text me then not text me
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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