I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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