Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize