Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
