walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
