I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize