Can i not drive my cunt home
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize