They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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