I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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