return my video game
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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