i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
