Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
