i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
