butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
