Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
