my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
