she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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