STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
