no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
