i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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