I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize