that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
