he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
you will always have a special place in my vag
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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