whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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