He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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