My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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