if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
