I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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