i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
