ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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