omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
