Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
