I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
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