I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
