1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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