do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
