Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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