so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize