oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
