i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
