So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
