This girl is more easily done than said...
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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