it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
