it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
