i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
