Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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