Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize