yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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