I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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